I typically want to keep this blog up-beat. Not only helpful, but inspiring.
But it's hard on days like today.
Days when I step on the scale and see that I've gained another pound.
I want to weep. I want to hide under the covers and never go out in public again. Never have to deal with pants that don't fit right and muffin tops and uncomfortable squeezing and shame.
Oh, the shame.
How did I let this happen?
I let my vigilance down for a seeming moment and then I started spiraling.
And I can't seem to stop.
I can't seem to really get motivated for more than a few days.
I'm tired. Really tired. The energy has gone.
Where did my motivation go?
Already the days where I felt healthier and happier seem long ago.
I want to just admit defeat. Honestly, I do. Because then at least I can say "I'm this way because I just don't try at all." And as a bit of a perfectionist, that seems better than where I'm at now where I try, fail, and get nothing.
I want to say bah humbug on the whole thing.
I don't know what to do. I just...don't know.
1 comment:
Hey Sara, It's Janee from the ward. I really enjoy your blog. I am struggling with my own weight loss battle (aren't we all?). I had a lousy week last week and it seems like I have a daunting distance to go. It is hard not to feel like giving up.
But I wanted to send you a hug and tell you not to give up. One of my favorite quotes is by Gordon B Hinckley- he said "The Lord did not send you here to fail". Keep going. You can do it. It will be so worth it. Keep going.
Let me know if you need a running buddy some morning.
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